Crisp Fall Air

Many more gifts.

3 gifts you gave today:
~Frugality.
~Thankfulness.
~Friendliness.

3 gifts loved:
~Time spend (by my mother-in-law) teaching me how to make beet borscht.
~My husband working so hard though this busy season to provide for us.
~The youth that God has given me to work with and serve.

3 gifts read:
~"Nevertheless, do not rejoice in this, that the spirits are subject to you, but rejoice that your names are written in heaven.'” Luke 10:20
~ "I tell you, though he will not get up and give him anything because he is his friend, yet because of his impudence he will rise and give him whatever he needs." Luke 11:8

~“Behold, God is my salvation;
    I will trust, and will not be afraid;
for the Lord God is my strength and my song,
    and he has become my salvation.” Isaiah 12:2 

3 gifts of persistence:
~God's unending grace.
~God's mercies, new every morning.
~God's love for me, always pursuing. 

3 gift's of enthusiam:
~Excitement as we look forward to attending the national Desiring God conference along with seeing Andrew Peterson in concert.
~Anticipation of my baby shower and getting to celebrate our little miracle with so many.
~Looking forward to actually meeting this little one and learning what she will be like.

A gift of challenge: 
God challenging me to change and to move out of my comfort zone.

A gift of conflict: 
God using one to show ME MY flaws and teaching me I don't have to give in to my feelings regardless of pregnancy hormones.

A gift of change:
Trusting Him and His Sanctifying work to make me more like Him.

3 gifts water:
~Watching fall rain drops gently land on the lake.
~Hot water for the many cups of tea I've had this week.
~Having plenty of water to wash laundry and bedding with.

A gift of Rhythm:
New Andrew Peterson Album.

A gift of Rhyme:
The new LeCrae album (just a little different from each other ;) )

A gift of Reason:
Such a rest and trust in the Lord when we cannot see our future because He is our loving Father who does all things for His glory and our good.

3 gifts in weakness:
 ~Truth from the Gospel to lead.
~Friends who lift up tired arms.
~Family who wrap around us.

3 gifts in jars:
~New fall candles.
~Cold medicine to help us both heal.
~Honey from a friend's wedding for my tea.

A gift of life:
The changing of the seasons.

A gift of growth:
God's growing my husband and I in trust of Him.

A gift of decline:
Nights of less sleep, getting me ready for our new wee one.


 

So much grace

3 gifts tasted:
~Coffee! I can only have a bit each day and it makes it all that more of a treat!
~Raspberry thumbprint scone.
~Chicken nuggets.

3 gifts found in difficult people:
~ Grace to realize it's not all about me.
~ Grace to realize my hormones were dictating a really bad attitude in myself.
~ Learning to turn an unhappy customer into a satisfied one by going outside of myself and above and beyond for them.

3 gifts round:
~My breakfast bowl of granola and fresh raspberries.

~Crackers in my soup at lunch.

~A plate full of dinner made by my mother-in-law after a very long day at work.

3 gifts white:
~The clouds chasing each other across the sky.
~ Hot creamy milk being poured from a pitcher into a mug.
~ Soup suds from my body wash in my hot shower at the end of my long day.

3 gifts surprisingly found:
~ To really enjoy my "boring soup" for lunch.

 ~ Getting to spend the evening with my in-laws.
~ Seeing a ground hog right up close to the front door.

3 lines overheard that were graces:
~ A cheer and "we were having a moment!" from the kitchen at our youth retreat at march (yes, it has taken me a while to remember to watch for this one).
~ "Rain, rain, go away, come again another day." Sung by a little customer in line today.
~ "I'm good" sung by my husband this evening (Trip Lee). It's a comfort to know he knows and believes this truth that we are good no matter what happens because we are in God's perfect will.

I was so comforted last night to be reminded of the Lord of a truth He has continually reminded me of in the past:
"Your eyes saw my unformed substance;
in your book were written, every one of them,
    the days that were formed for me,
    when as yet there was none of them." Psalm 139:16
What a comfort!

How Does He Love me?

Yesterdays will have to do for today ;).
Yesterdays Joy Dare gifts to find were 3 ways I feel the love of God.
Simple yes?
Not at all.
But first I'll post my 3 ways:
~An extended time of prayer and Bible study. Learning to preach the gospel to myself and praise Him for hard things (more on that in a minute).
~Lunch with some of my favorite ladies followed by heart confetti cupcake making. The encouragement and joy brought cannot be measured.
~ A husband who loves me extravagantly day in and day out, not who just woos me on holidays.

That husband has encouraged me in the past to learn to preach the Gospel to myself on hard days.How  I knew what the truth is. Now I needed to  remind  myself of it. Speak the Word.

I got it, yea yea.

But I got it this week.

I got up on Monday not a mom. "Hope" again "gone". I wanted to mope. I wanted to cry and feel sorry for myself. Instead I praised God for His Soverignty and His goodness.His goodness had not changed. My joy should not therefore change.  He knows what is best for me, and for us and for our family.

This morning, I'll be brutally honest here, the last thing I wanted to do was get up and go to work. I feel lost, stuck and ready for change.

I laid in bed and prayed. I got up and praised.
And it worked. He gave me His joy, because as I thanked Him, for again, this was His perfect plan for us.
He is good.
Even when.
That's how much He loves me.

What we really need

So many times God tells me no or wait and I throw fits and then learn, the very hard way how He knows so much better than me. And I admit this, and move on with life and completely forget it. I don't know how many times I've done this! I'm glad He is abundantly patient with me!

This past year has been rough in some regards. The main one being (and it's kind of hard to write about this in a public place, but I feel it is beneficial to others, and so I will) that we have been trying to start a family and it's just not happening like I "want" it to. Like I "planned".
Which is hard on a few levels.
I forget that God is sovereign and in complete control. I go through mixed emotions of feeling broken, aching, judging others who are parents and comparing myself (which is not only sinful, but absurd). And that's just the tip of the iceberg!

God's taught me a few things through this time and with the help of my husband.
He's taught me that I have no idea what is best for me and that I need to just trust Him. This is so cliche and so hard to actually do.
A Sovereign grace song has been going through my mind this week:
" You disarmed me of everything that I would lean on
So I would lean on You
And You stripped me of everything I would depend on
So I’d depend on You"
A verse I have relied on through much of this is Romans 8:32:
He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things?
Believing He actually always knows what is best is a wonderful place to be.
Know He knows. Truly trust that He is for you. Because He is!

More than you'll ever know

Five years ago the man and I spent our first Valentines day separated by more than a thousand miles. I saw him a couple of days later and he proposed!

Five amazing years later, and I now know that he believes Valentines is a silly made up holiday, made for the sake of consumerism.

That year however I was giddy and made him a special gift he still treasures. Funny thing is, something I now find a little corny is what prompted him to encourage me to get back to blogging (among other things).

I wrote him a "fairy tale" about a princess (me) and her prince, scrap book style with our few pictures in it.
When I was young I used to think I'd be a writer, but that's fallen by the way side over the years.
Andrew told me that this gift is part of what made him fall in love with me. Go figure.
Today as I was praying and thanking the Lord for a man who loves me so much.
He loves me where I am, encourages me where I need to grow and nurtures things in me I don't even realize are there sometimes. I am also so grateful for a husband who loves the Lord so much and who's desire is to serve Him and His people all his life.

During my quiet time today I was also thinking about God's huge love for me and how He has shown me /us that over the years.
In so many little and huge ways He has taken care of us and redirected our plans. What a loving thing to do!
The man put this quote on my facebook wall not to long ago, and it really spoke to me:
"You're more sinful than you ever dared believe; you're more loved than you ever dared hope."
Tim Keller

^"For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord." Romans 8:38-39

God's love for us isn't based on how we live or what good things we have done. It's based on Christ and the cross. I can courageously wake up each morning and approach the throne of grace boldly knowing that He sees me in Christ, that I cannot have a righteousness of my own, but that His love for me will never change. He doesn't love me out of principle (because He has to) , but because He truly loves me!
Bask in His love today!